Would you do that at a house party?

We've all received them at one point or another, the spammy solicitations about a program or product that you just have to try. Sometimes these messages come from people on the outskirts of your life, the people in the bleachers, but sometimes you get them from people you know fairly well or even direct friends of yours and you get blindsided and may not know what to say. No matter the circumstance, it doesn't feel good to be sold to. It doesn't feel good to have people make assumptions about what you need, especially if they don't know what is going on with your life and circumstances. To give you an example, I received a DM from a gal that I've known for years but haven't spoken with one on one for about a year. We have stayed in contact via social media with comments here and there but nothing past the social media veil. The message said "Hey Katie, I am making over $5,000 a month with this new product called (X) and I know it would help you a ton and you could be making this type of money, too!" What the hell? I was taken back. I never thought of this person as a schmoozer, but all of a sudden they came at me with something that I may be interested in but unfortunately because of their approach I was instantly turned off to a conversation. She didn't ask about me. She didn't start the conversation with oh I don't know, conversation! Her message wasn't about me, it was about her. My second thought was, huh, how could she "know" that it would be help me when she doesn't know my circumstances? So many questions... I was also pissed because her approach goes against everything that I teach to and she knows that (she was actually a client several years ago). It made me think about how people act online vs. how they act in the real-world and I came up with this scenario: Imagine the above situation exactly as it went down but if it happened at a house party. There I am standing in the kitchen mingling with others and in comes "the schmoozer". She doesn't say hi, how are you or any niceties but just gets in my space and says "Hey Katie, I am making over $5,000 a month with this new product...etc." How do you think that would go over? If that happened to you would you respond with "Oh my gosh, YES! Tell me how?!" after not seeing this person or talking to this person for years? I don't think so. You'd walk away from them, ignore them, laugh it off or confront them. The purpose of this scenario is to make a point that relationship building is required for any sort of sales conversation, whether you know the person or not. We live in a time where we can get anything our hearts desire with a few key strokes so why would we purchase anything from a real, live, human being? Because of connection. We want to have a relationship with others, to connect with them and most importantly to feel heard and know that we matter. So the next time you are looking at your prospect list or quotas to meet, run through what you are going to say and how you are going to approach the conversation and ask. Would you present yourself that way if you were in-person? If you saw your prospect at a house party? Lastly, if you are the recipient of the schmoozy solicitation, I recommend you respond with exactly how you feel when you receive it. Let that person know that you are caught off-guard, possibly interested but need conversation or that you are simply not interested in doing business with someone you don't have a relationship with (or at least a conversation). Xo Katie